May 21, 2009

Really?

Ayden had his first coaches pitch practice today with his new team. Ive been so excited to get him started and holding out that I would get to help coach the team. Well as if I should be surprised, my plans was foiled.

We arrived at practice and it was a joke. I took off early today to make sure I had him to his first practice early to help him get settled in and meet his team mates. I thought getting there at least 30 mins. early would surly do the trick. Well...no dice. The practice was scheduled to start at 5:30 per the coach. Oh what a work of art the coach is. If I was into drugs, this guy would be my man. I hate judging anyone by the way they look, but this guy is a piece of art.

I digress....we arrived to the field at 5 till 5:00. I had to take out of work early but for Ayden, not a problem. As we roll up we see about a dozen kids on the field. Hey no problem the field is open to other teams, and this was for sure another team wrapping up their scheduled practice. As we was getting our stuff together and heading to the field about three other cars pulled up. Just reinforcing the fact that our team was arriving and this team on the field was not ours. Well....no quite. Turns out Mr. Coach told some people to be there at 4:30. Some others at 5:00 and a few others 5:30. Our team was on the field and had been for about 30 min. What a joke! I have to admit I was just a little pissed. Well as the time wore on it got even better. As I've mentioned our coach is a real work of art. He had no control over getting these kids together, deciding what to do, and well the guy is just not cut out to lead anything but apparently a bong to his mouth. Again Dad is heating up by the minute. Coach couldn't even decide on a time to tell all of the parents.

Well needless to say it took all of about an hour to waste every parents time there. No order, no plan, nothing. It was a sad state of affairs. The whole ordeal was not only disappointing for Ayden, but Dad was beyond pissed by the end of it and highly disappointed that he will not be participating with anything but Aydens cheerleader. Which at the end of the day, is all good. I'm already his biggest fan, why not just sit back and enjoy the train wreak and cheer my son on?

The real kicker with all of this is that the last round of basketball we had to go thru the same type of situation. Our coach was not only showing up to our practices lit up, but to our games having to wear sunglasses to cover up his road map eyes. It's sad that they let these types of people who are supposed to be role models for the kids, with-in a hundred feet of the kids let alone coach them. I will be much more proactive from here on out and take the reins and do a little more research on what I choose to get Ayden involved in. I also plan to get my application in the day they are open to collect for prospective coaches and hopefully not only can I coach his team, but maybe become a coach the kids will not have to worry about having fun with.

The whole situation just blows my mind!
Really?

May 14, 2009

Schedule Set!


Ayden's all set for the rest of spring and all of summer!
And to be honest,
Dad is too!

Today we finalized his football schedule and DAD is PUMPED! I cant wait to see how he is going to take on football. Since I never got to play football as a kid (thanks Mom) and I love the game so much, I am chomping at the bit to see how he will do. I imagine he will love it until that first good hit...then who knows? Hopefully he loves it, but that will be his decision.

So next month starts the whirl wind of sports goodness. First is coaches pitch, then football camp. Followed by another football camp, and if Ayden enjoys them both he will start Mighty Mights in August. Hopefully another round of basketball will follow but that of course will be up to him. Looks like a busy summer ahead!

May 09, 2009

Fishing with the buddies!


Ayden and Max getting ready to enjoy a day of fishing. Max is the son of my closest friend Brent. The age difference between Max and Ayden are the same as their fathers. They seem to have made a special bond already and it's the greatest thing for the four of us to spend time together.


Ayden loves to fish! He is actually much better at it already then I ever was. I think he enjoys it more then I ever did, but I love to watch him. Of coarse he tells me what he's doing to catch the next big fish and I take it all in!



Sheesh...the boys are trying to fish! Brent and I took the time to catch up and the boys was all business.



Brent happens to love fishing and is pretty good at it. It looks like Max is going to follow in the footsteps.



The first catch of the day! Look at that whale! The boys both enjoyed catching a few fish before it was all over. The day was a great success. Nothing better then spending the day with the two sweetest kids on earth all in the company of a great friend. Im sure there will be plenty of fishing in the future for the four of us!

May 08, 2009

He said, She said.....



It's no secret that I am a bit partial when it comes to my son. Parents right. So it would come as no shock for me to think that Ayden is very intelligent for his age and has an imagination worthy of a best selling fiction writer. Ayden is right brain dominate and that is just one of many things he and I share. Studies show that most kids start right brain dominate and as they age the left brain usage increases. I think at times I am so far right that the left becomes the center. Thank goodness it is just the brain. If I was anything else that far "right" I would ask for someone to put me away.

So what's wrong with any of this? Nothing. Lately though I believe his strong right brain dominance creates a active imagination that is causing issues between his Mother and I. Nothing wrong with an imagination. I believe the world would be a better place it everyone had a stronger more active imagination. It seems that Ayden has been "filling in the gaps" at times when it comes to mine and his Mother's actions and words. Ayden is six years old and has already faced some things in his life that has come a bit early for him. Divorce, separate homes, and all that comes with those challenges has in my belief been put on him at a challenging time of his growth. He as adapted as well as any six year could possibly do, but as to be expected regardless of age a few speed bumps are experienced.

The challenge I face is how to approach trying to help Ayden with the facts. There have been a few conversations he and I have had regarding various issues. When a similar topic is discussed with his Mother he tends to bend it a bit. Not all the time. Possibly not anymore then any 6 year old would do. But given our situation of a broken home, two or three misunderstandings and they can turn into a large problem. I only know my side. I can only speculate the other. With me knowing exactly what a conversation between us has been about and what has been discussed his Mother has to make a decision whether what I said was fact or it's Ayden filling in the gaps. It's caused a few heated arguments from both sides. Whatever we can do to prevent another battle between the North and South, is a preference. Just in case you might wonder who is who, I'm the North. No the South will not rise again.

Seriously though Ayden will not always get it right. He is just six. I just want to do what I can to help him realize the importance of doing his best to get it as close as possible. If he is going to tell his Mother something about our conversations it's important that he does the best he can. The same if he chooses to tell me about theirs. A common mutual respect between his Mother and I plays a large role as well. That also is a work in progress. Two years into the current situation and it's strange how much a person forgets what the other is really like. I have been questioned about things that shouldn't have been a question. Completely not who I am or what I am about. Ayden came with the facts as he thought he knew them, but unfortunately not shedding me in the best light with his Mother. Likewise he has told me a few things about his Mother that I had to think long and hard about if they were on the mark. Most of the things was just Ayden filling in the gaps and I regretted asking his Mother about them, after knowing the facts.

A challenge is ahead of us. I don't want to have to spend the next twelve years trying to explain or be explained to. Ayden shouldn't have to worry about anything. I dont want to put this at his feet. This is not his problem, his fault. It's just the position he has been put in. It's a awkward position for him to have to be in, but as with all things Ayden, he will not let me down!

May 05, 2009

Along the path......



It's funny.

I started this blog in hopes of sharing my day to day life with Ayden. My light, my inspiration, my little man that means so much to me. Yet I find it harder and harder everyday to let loose of the things that are happening in my life. I struggle with turning this blog into Thomas' World way too much. I have drama and things happening in my life that I want to write about yet I stop short because this is AydensWorld. A story of me living his world. About him. Not me. Yet it's a struggle. Even though I feel it's a disservice to make this about my personal life outside of Ayden, my behind the scenes life does directly relate to me being Ayden's father and living in his world.

I have so many things that I passed up writing about because I filter those emotions and channel my energy to only write about Ayden directly, but is that really AydensWorld? Is that really living in his world as I intended. Every part of my life evolves around him, so wouldn't it be safe to say that no matter what I write about it would qualify for living in his world? Who cares anyway? This is MY rambling blog, not yours, so why does it even matter? I don't write content for the audience. If one even exists.
I write content for Ayden.

With these ramblings heed this warning. There maybe some changes take place with Aydensworld. I may take this thing to the deep, dark, inner thoughts of Aydens dad and it might get back to being a little dark. A little sad. A little funny. A little different. Who knows? Everyday is something new. No longer will I filter my thoughts and emotions. Maybe, just maybe, with me lifting the muffles, and writing what is on my mind, then this little ditty will be updated more?

I am just wondering down the short path of life wanting to capture my thoughts and feelings with my son being the spot lite. I just want to give him something to read, and understand what a joy it is to be his Father. The biggest fan Ayden could ever have in his life, writing about his experiences.

I have skipped so many things to write about because of my state of mind. Ive skipped certain events, holidays and special times with Ayden. Christmas this past year was completely passed over even though this was my year with Ayden. We had a great time, but with the great time came some really dark, disturbing thoughts. So it was skipped. Censored.

I never wanted him to read this project and really see that his old man was kind of a eccentric. A loner. A sometimes depressive mind that has all of these struggles with being the best father he can be and keep his own train on the track through the sometimes rocky road of his own life. Like every great story, mine has it's share of mistakes, dark thoughts, and disappointment.
Isn't a censored thought a lost thought?

What is this little project if it's not truly the uncensored, unbridled thoughts of the person creating it? The whole thing becomes stale and inaccurate and misses the point with it's intent. I live in Aydensworld, and it's truly a blessing. With every joy comes every challenge and doubt. Every disappointment and shortcoming. Without the pain, the joy would not be recognized.

Why the pressure?